How are you doing with your faith?
Haha just kidding. I don't even know what that question means. I feel like we Christians use this language a lot with out understanding the very surface of what we are saying. "How are you are doing with your faith" has some strange implications. It implies faith is something that you aquire by your own will. I believe that having faith has a decision involved, but i do not think that anyone can go into things deliberately in order to strengthen their faith. Everyone's faith will be tested through the course of time and by extreme boredom.
Faith is that thing that people fall back on when everything around them seems to be meaningless.
In Ecclesiates, Solomon seems to only see the world as vanity. The interesting thing is that vanity cannot recognize itself. When Solomon declares that the entire world holds no meaning, he says so on a very particular basis.
He Knows that there is meaning in this world and that God's hand is somehow on it and that His promises will some true, but he looks around the world and sees no evidence of this.
This is faith.
When i came to college, i expected there to be seriously hard times. What i did no expect, however, was the immense amount of spiritual boredom that met me as i stepped into classes. Spiritually, I have been as dry as ever. It made me angry and i still am to some extent. Part of me desperately wants to have my passion back. That burning fire was what kept me going for so long. Now i have study the literary structure in the Old Testament simply in order to get a good grade on a test. Its boring. But sometimes, it is what is needed.
The passion won't always be there. But sometimes, it is up to us to decide if we still want to follow Him.
Whatever that means.
Love, Frank
Saturday, November 26, 2011
Saturday, November 19, 2011
Dim Light
My roomate says some pretty hilarious things sometimes, but only when he really isn't trying. I would give some examples but you would not be able to concentrate on my blog at all after you heard them. He also says some very profound things when he isn't trying. As we were walking up to the cafeteria to get some breakfast one morning, Jake defined my college experience.
It was early, around 7:30, and the overcast sky sent a blanket of opaque light over our campus as we walked up leaf-covered steps. As we approached the familiar path a sudden memory strikes Jake as he notices the dim light coming from the lamp posts off to our right.
"Its crazy that last night the light coming from those things was super bright and now they aren't doing anything."
I had to stop walking.
At home, my life seemed to have so much purpose. Like God was using me. I felt like i meant something. There is something about a private Christian college that, for me, tends to steal that away. Everywhere around me I see good people doing good things with good smiles on their faces. The opaque light of "goodness" almost seems suffocating at times. If the whole campus is lit up with the things that people are doing, it seems so so easy and tempting to turn my little light off.
As i walked by these little lights, i couldn't help but to mock their eerie light as they struggled to resist my cynical opinions. It wasn't until later that i began to understand why lamp posts even existed.
The easy thing about living in an environment like my home is that it seemed to beg for light. There was an urgency in the way i let my light shine. I felt as if i were on top of a dark hill on a lampstand pointing to the creator of the world. Jesus burned with intensity through me and the radiance of His Father's glory was shown. At college, it seemed for me that this burning intensity became tame and foggy. It seemed omnipresent but not omnipotent. This was where i went wrong. Who am I to suggest that God changes who He is based on where I am? God is the same yesterday, today, and forever. Yes, it may be hard to continue shining when it seems meaningless. But God will never be meaningless and our faith must be placed in that. We must trust the things that Jesus says and tells us to do. Why? Because it is good.
That night i returned down the path that had seemed so pathetic to me hours before and i saw what i had forgotten. The path once again looked like home. Full of intensity and mystery. The contrast of the lightness and darkness was so real. So beautiful. My light holds intense meaning regardless to what time of the day it is. And so does yours. It is not for us to decide what has value. The judge of that is God alone.
Love, Frank
It was early, around 7:30, and the overcast sky sent a blanket of opaque light over our campus as we walked up leaf-covered steps. As we approached the familiar path a sudden memory strikes Jake as he notices the dim light coming from the lamp posts off to our right.
"Its crazy that last night the light coming from those things was super bright and now they aren't doing anything."
I had to stop walking.
At home, my life seemed to have so much purpose. Like God was using me. I felt like i meant something. There is something about a private Christian college that, for me, tends to steal that away. Everywhere around me I see good people doing good things with good smiles on their faces. The opaque light of "goodness" almost seems suffocating at times. If the whole campus is lit up with the things that people are doing, it seems so so easy and tempting to turn my little light off.
As i walked by these little lights, i couldn't help but to mock their eerie light as they struggled to resist my cynical opinions. It wasn't until later that i began to understand why lamp posts even existed.
The easy thing about living in an environment like my home is that it seemed to beg for light. There was an urgency in the way i let my light shine. I felt as if i were on top of a dark hill on a lampstand pointing to the creator of the world. Jesus burned with intensity through me and the radiance of His Father's glory was shown. At college, it seemed for me that this burning intensity became tame and foggy. It seemed omnipresent but not omnipotent. This was where i went wrong. Who am I to suggest that God changes who He is based on where I am? God is the same yesterday, today, and forever. Yes, it may be hard to continue shining when it seems meaningless. But God will never be meaningless and our faith must be placed in that. We must trust the things that Jesus says and tells us to do. Why? Because it is good.
That night i returned down the path that had seemed so pathetic to me hours before and i saw what i had forgotten. The path once again looked like home. Full of intensity and mystery. The contrast of the lightness and darkness was so real. So beautiful. My light holds intense meaning regardless to what time of the day it is. And so does yours. It is not for us to decide what has value. The judge of that is God alone.
Love, Frank
Wednesday, November 9, 2011
Hard Times
Holy Cow.
College campuses seem to by like breeding grounds for stress and anxiety. If anyone feels differently, please share with me the number to your school's admissions office so i can transfer. This past week became one of the most difficult weeks that i have faced in a very long time. I had a week to re-write ten-page research paper, prepare a supreme court case speech, study for a large old testament exam, and complete my regular assignments. I got so stressed out and could barely handle the pressure. My roomate helped out a lot but he couldn't stiffle the messages that i was hearing.
"How are you going to keep your scholarships if you GPA is already struggling as a first semester freshman?"-- "Maybe social work shouldn't be your major if you don't even care much about getting an education?"--"Maybe you should focus more on your fall-back plan"-- "You really think you are good enough to keep up with work loads like this?"
These messages are what kept me in a realm of apathy for the greater part of last weekend. I got so behind in all of my assignments and would stare at a computer screen for many frustrating hours believing that i coulln't do what i wanted because i didn't have what it took. Once the day came, however, like in a typical sit com everything fell into place like magic. I praised God for the work that, by His grace, He was willing to bless me with. It was yesterday afternnon that i reveled in His glory as i got to witness His mercy in my life.
But soon i had to quetion....
Why does it seem that hard times bring such a raw sense of God's power? Why are my eyes able to see God in a more clear way in the midst of adversity? Does God want me close and therefore want me to go through hard times?
Here is what Andrew Murray believes based on an excerpt about his reflections of John 15:3 -
"What is the pruning knife of this heavenly Husbandman? It is often said to be affliction, but is this the tool He uses? How would it then fare with many who have long seasons free adversity; or with some on whom God appears to shower down kindness all their life? No; it is the Word of God that is the knife, sharper than any two-edged sword, that pierces even to the dividing asunder of the soul and spirit, and that is quick to discern the thoughts and intents of the heart"
- Andrew Murray
So maybe times that bring us closer to God have little to do with the circumstance and much more to do with what the circumstances reveal about our hearts by the power of the Word that was there in the begining and now lives with us in our hearts. Rejoice, and always abide in Him.
Love, Frank
College campuses seem to by like breeding grounds for stress and anxiety. If anyone feels differently, please share with me the number to your school's admissions office so i can transfer. This past week became one of the most difficult weeks that i have faced in a very long time. I had a week to re-write ten-page research paper, prepare a supreme court case speech, study for a large old testament exam, and complete my regular assignments. I got so stressed out and could barely handle the pressure. My roomate helped out a lot but he couldn't stiffle the messages that i was hearing.
"How are you going to keep your scholarships if you GPA is already struggling as a first semester freshman?"-- "Maybe social work shouldn't be your major if you don't even care much about getting an education?"--"Maybe you should focus more on your fall-back plan"-- "You really think you are good enough to keep up with work loads like this?"
These messages are what kept me in a realm of apathy for the greater part of last weekend. I got so behind in all of my assignments and would stare at a computer screen for many frustrating hours believing that i coulln't do what i wanted because i didn't have what it took. Once the day came, however, like in a typical sit com everything fell into place like magic. I praised God for the work that, by His grace, He was willing to bless me with. It was yesterday afternnon that i reveled in His glory as i got to witness His mercy in my life.
But soon i had to quetion....
Why does it seem that hard times bring such a raw sense of God's power? Why are my eyes able to see God in a more clear way in the midst of adversity? Does God want me close and therefore want me to go through hard times?
Here is what Andrew Murray believes based on an excerpt about his reflections of John 15:3 -
"What is the pruning knife of this heavenly Husbandman? It is often said to be affliction, but is this the tool He uses? How would it then fare with many who have long seasons free adversity; or with some on whom God appears to shower down kindness all their life? No; it is the Word of God that is the knife, sharper than any two-edged sword, that pierces even to the dividing asunder of the soul and spirit, and that is quick to discern the thoughts and intents of the heart"
- Andrew Murray
So maybe times that bring us closer to God have little to do with the circumstance and much more to do with what the circumstances reveal about our hearts by the power of the Word that was there in the begining and now lives with us in our hearts. Rejoice, and always abide in Him.
Love, Frank
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